Open Wide
December 26, 2007

South Park, Family Guy and Spa Q aside, I would have to say that ESPN SportsCenter is the best TV show, of all time. Simply because it covers the only news that matters, sports.

After all these years watching the show, it occurs to me that the women of SportsCenter make the best life partners. And I'm pretty sure I'm not the only who think so. In fact, I bet there are countless men out there who see these lady anchors as the ideal partner.

Let's ignore the fact that men will love them because of their looks. I for one am not in the position to you know, put looks up there in the list. Couldn't really expect someone soothing to the eye when you're a sore to the eye, could you?

Moving on, imagine yourself at IKEA and going at 50% less is this totally awesome bedsheet with a Jordan 23 silhouette logo on it. You've wanted it since you were a kid and as your mom was the law back then, you had to settle for a flowery bedsheet instead.

"Don't you weep no more, it's got blue flowers on them... still fine for a boy plus it goes well with the wallpaper. Now I'll make sure none of you friends make fun of you because of it allright..." as she fixes the sheet onto your bed while you wipe your tears.

At the counter, with glee, you say,

"Look what I got for our bed hun... you love His Royal Airness too dontcha..?"

To which your super hot SportsCenter anchor lady wife replies,

"Oh that's just lovely dear... I'll fix it once we get home OK? Looks like I'll have to serve two kings on the bed from now on eh..?"

"Well aren't you the sweetest thing? Don't you worry about serving two kings babe... only one of us is well hung..!" striking this pose.

Imagine yourself at the sofa on a Saturday night with all the necessities in place. A Big Gulp in the left hand, a bag of Twisties in the right, remote on the belly, leg up on the leg-rest; all too perfect a setting to watch the world's greatest team, Manchester City FC play.

All of a sudden your old lady stomps to the living room, grabs the remote off your belly and switches to E! for the rerun of Celebrity Hiccups... the very same episode she watched earlier that day..!

You're left there with your mouth wide open, in awe of your ruthless wife as she takes a sip on your Big Gulp.

In another life however, your yet again super hot SportsCenter anchor lady wife, in a skimpy City kit and hot pants, prances into the living room, snatches the bag of Twisties off your hand, takes out the biggest bit and flies it into your mouth while making the sound of a flying plane.

"Open wiiiiiiiiiiiiide... weooo... Air Twisties is landing... City won't win if the plane doesn't land... aaaaaaammm... good boy, mwaahh..!"

And you munched Air Twisties, bit... by bit... as time stood still, for you to enjoy the most beautiful smile in the world and the sparkle in her eyes.

Well, hope I made my point there.



Comments:

Don't the SportsCenter ladies support Man Youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu?
 

damn you're dreaming too much..
hahaha.. nasi lemak antarabangsa amcam?
 

serih yg manja....auuuuwwwwww

check out my link, mama's boy
 

Jeez demmit Serih, are all men like you?!!

I know Ben for sure, se-spesis ngan ngko…arghhh~

After screwing up between “The Reds” & “Red Devil” the other day (yikes!), I am so gonna get myself khatamkan “The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Football/Liverpool/Super hot SportsCenter anchor lady gf--or so they call it!(& sumber2 ilmiah yang sewaktu denganye)

Seyes, ko nyer write-up kali ini meninggalkan impak yang maksima buat ku…wowo~

I bet u wrote this, time ko sangap kat ofis kan? (& ur boss were like thinking, “bagusnye anak buahku buat kerja dengan kusyuknya!”)..haha, padahal~

Nways, I think the gravity pressure at Level 76 must have sucked a lil’ too much oxygen from your brain, as ur imaginations seemed to run way too wild this time lar bro..haha!

Oh & yeah-ur into Spa-Q? Bwahahahahahaaaawww…Err…no offense, but yes MX-- Serih yang manja...=P
 

Sani: No lady can not love a team with Sven in it.

Nali: Balik KL sound aku woi... nombor talipon sama.

Hussen: Awesome video mate.

Hanim: Now where do I start. Whatever you do... for that 90 minutes on that Saturday night, just stay away from the remote. That's all he'll need from you. 90 minutes, once a week. Well, the other time he'll need you during the week won't last no longer than two minutes, knowing Ben. Allright I hope the message wasn't too subliminal on that one. :)
 

No issues there, sifu Serih..I can live without TV. Just don’t take away from me any of my audio gizmo then I’ll play nice. Pity him jela, ain't got nobody to respond to him bitching about d’opponent’s team/players…coz I’ll be like--"Err..duhh..Elano who? Anak sapa la tuh?" & he’ll go like --"haih~dungu betul…bazer karen jer aku cakap ngan minah nih"(cakap dalam hati jela tapi ada berani) =P. Xpe, plahan2 kayuh~i’ll catch up! Bless me with omniscient guidance oh mighty sifu.. =). Ni lagi satu sengal nak catch up neh..2 mins? For what? Looks like u "KNOW" Ben better than i do neh…adepape ke? Ngahaha~ =P
 

ehhh got ladies who watch football also okay. this particular one sanggup bangun/stay up at all hours of night and day to tengok bola tau. it's just that the more discerning of us don't bother with city losers when we know which manchester team is the best...hoho.
 

serih kamu suka bermimpi. tapi gambar salah tu memang sesuai dgn entry kau. kau amik salah jadik model utk blog kau ke?

tak tau la lepas ni kuar gambar salah buat aksi apa lak.

tapi serih, dulu ada org kata ko ada iras2 p****e a***e. kira kau ni hot stuff gak.
 

eh you forgot, i bet she'll whoop up great food for that super important party when City goes into the champions league..

and hanna, dont forget, city won against united earlier this season.

ho ho ho.
 

Mak oih, ada rupanya pompuan bangun tengah malam tgk bola. Aku suka dooo kalau pompuan sanggup bangun malam tgk bola.


Bola kocek laaa tapi.

I'm not really into sports, dude. But damn, you paint a god damn pretty picture. So pretty that I spent the last 30 minutes googling 'soccer babes'. I am now again, one of the good guys.

God bless.
 

we, pose kali ni cam tak kena la...
 

oh you so remind me of the vow i made as a little girl; never marry an ESPN freak. he hogs the remote. and then whinges about how football-unfriendly women are! hahahahaha.

btw, of course tic tacs arent real food. switch to chewing gum instead.
 

I've to correct pie ... serip looks more like a fat pierre andre

Baron, daymn G .. u remind me of the good old days when I used to stare at those topless gurls covered by paint in the form of a soccer jersey

Serip, I've to agree with you on one thing .. ESPN babes .. Joy Nakrin is fuckin gorgeous .. Edlin Ismail however, can take her gedikness all the way to hell .. She anchors the Sportscenter like it's the fuckin E! channel.

Dude, have you watched this year's victoria's secret fashion show? Fuckin awesome dude!!! Left me speechless lookin at Miranda Kerr arr arrrrrrrr
 

Anem: Just got back from PD ah. Super shiznit it was BBQ tepi kolam mandi it was yeargh..! Nothing beats a night out with the guys, biarpun sausage fest both on and off the BarBie... argh!

Hanna: Read Ikram's comment.

Pie: Jangan la kau bagi modal dah kat budak-budak ni. Ramai do tengah simpan hasrat nak revenge aku. Padahal aku cakap menda betul je pun selama ni haha...

Ikram: Thanks for reminding Hanna man.

Cloudde: Aren't we all bro, aren't we all... one of the good guys?

Salah: Aku ada gambaq lain yop tapi simpan untuk later la orait. This one aku tengok ada that proud smile sambil cekak pinggang, boleh la kut sambil tipu orang cakap hang 'well hung'.

Trishomachine: Do that Air Twisties thing to any ESPN and the remote shall be yours in no time..! :)

Bart: STFU..! Quit cursing every single word when you're shit at it. Hard to believe, at 24 and after spending four years overseas... a VS fashion show can still give you a bloody boner. Join us for the next road trip man... you need some growing up to do.
 

dream on serih sucks!!!
 

Aku agak dah masa aku tgk gambar pose salah kali ni. To be honest, I'm going to have to go with Salah. Bukan tak berapa kena, doo. Tak kena langsung. It's like watching a bad Carlos Mencia stand up sketch. You wait and wait for the punch line and when it's out, you feel a little bit dissapointed."Huh? Really? I was expecting something else..." Maybe a little bit of courtesy laughs.

Jgn ckp gitu doo ngan Badol. Although I agree that he needs some growing up to do, he made a good point. Reaching 24 with 4 years of exp living overseas doesn't mean that you shouldn't get a boner watching Vic Sec. Hell, I don't want to live in a world where I can't get a boner watching Vic Sec. As a matter of fact, I wish I can watch Vic Sec every day till the day I die.


Oh btw, I wasn't referring to Badol's height or his level of maturity.
 

I prefer ladies in rock music. So she can understand why im singing about a gambling house in Montreux, near lake Geneva.

not linkin park rock or muse rock or my chemical romance rock. pfqkhx€fttt

I mean Sheryl Crow or Joan Jett or Joss Stone.

Norah Jones rocks harder than whoever fronting that Fort Minor band.

tak caya tanya Serih.

salahx
 

Najib: D50 aku, 2.5k. Come on mate..?!

Faidz: Aw, gimme more credit brotha. You could've at least used a bad Conan moment instead of Mencia's to ridicule me man. I've always hated Mencia's guts as if you don't already known; fella needs to calm down. On the Badol beat, I can only nod in agreement.

Salah: Hang memang gempa Salah. Norah Jones kalau dia nyanyi sket lullaby kat hang mau tidoq 2 3 hari tak bangun wo...
 

miranda kerr sangat hot. i'd make out with her.
 

Serip:
Why the hell would I be interested in a get together with a bunch of fat ass dudes wearing nothing but thongs by the beach. You can express your manlove somewhere else my friend.

Baron:
Totally agree with u dude. What's wrong with havin' dirty fantasies. Serip nak bukake selalu je.

Hanna:
WOW at least somebody agreed with me about Miranda Kerr. I guess great minds do think alike kwakwakwa.
 

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Photography by Azalia Suhaimi

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  • Asrif, b. 1983
  • Subang Jaya, Malaysia
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