Eight Random Facts
January 21, 2008

Well what in the name of Johnny B. Goode are eight random facts about you? Najib tagged.
  1. Whenever I’m at the laundromat, I like to steal undergarments off female strangers’ laundry baskets, mix them with my own laundry in the washing machine and just watch it for pleasure before sneaking them back into their baskets.
  2. Nah, not really. I couldn’t think of eight facts so I thought I’d write seven real ones and one messed up fictional one up on top just for giggles. Judd does it for real though.
  3. There’s only one CD in my PlayStation 2 and it’s Winning Eleven. Other games are forbidden. It’s the only game worth playing and it separates the men from the boys. It’s the modern equivalence of the ancient duels of Japanese samurais, English knights and Roman gladiators. It makes WoW look like Tetris. *run*
  4. I have a problem with keeping my amusements to myself. Whenever I see something funny (gay couples, transvestites, you know) I have to breathe in and out of a paper bag to maintain my composure; otherwise I’ll just burst. If only I had the willpower to control my laughter. I’ve lost count the number of girl-dating tomboys who tried to smash my head with their scooter helmets already.
  5. When I was 14, I was banned from watching professional wrestling for putting my then 11 year old brother unconscious after giving him a Tombstone Piledriver. No I wasn’t daft enough to do it on the floor. I landed his head on the sofa... not realizing that it would reach a wooden plank at the bottom; scariest day of my life. Well I did feel a bit like The Undertaker doing it to Kane nevertheless.
  6. The pinky of my left hand goes dead whenever I play the guitar. I can’t fret any note with it; let alone do mean hammer-ons. But no ladies don’t run away... with the guitar off, my fingers are all fine and spanky I mean, dandy.
  7. I made it to the Under-10 school football team when I was 9; was the only one too. Impressive eh? Not quite... the rest of the team hated me. They made me lift the heaviest guy during training and barely passed the ball my way during games. Twats.
  8. Just as the disability to control my laughter, I can’t control my cursing very well either. Those who have played futsal or basketball with me would know. I’ve since mellowed down and evidently, it has improved my game; albeit still being on the mediocre side of things.
  9. Last but not least, I have a gap between my front teeth; to the delight of my friends. I used to think it was pretty cool as I can do that human water fountain thing. Not anymore when you have pricks as friends. They just can never quit pointing out the gap whenever girls are around. Then again I suppose they didn’t really have to; it’s as obvious as Lionel Richie at a KISS concert.
I’m supposed to tag another eight. Can you post it up on your blog and say I tagged? Sweet.


"I’ve since mellowed down and evidently, it has improved my game..."

improved? seriously??? how bad was your game before if this is considered "improvement"?!?!

don't worry ebby yus, if madonna still hasn't fixed her gapped teeth, you're good.

Okaaay. (Referring to no. 1) I was about to think that you're a sex maniac or something. Talk about first impression.

You sound Subang.

sex maniac is an understatement

number 6 yg notty..


Hanna: Weren't you one of the many who cheered my name at the '05 Midwest? You lot were lovely. Still are.

Judd: At least I'm not you man.

Wani: What's wrong with helping others with their laundry? :)

Ali: Appreciate it bro.

Haley: No. 6? Main gitar? Tak naughty mana aihh. Brader Ali^^ kita lain sket, he dry humps the guitar like Hendrix.

After reading your post this time, I feel the need to apologize for all the gay jokes that I threw at you long ago. I am so sorry, bro. I did not know that you really are a homosexual. Oh hey, that's another random fact to add to your list.

Your cursing ain't the only thing that have mellowed down. Your ability to talk casually to girls on the phone have as well, you sexy mellow phone talker!!!

If it were 9 random facts, would you put that you bring girly bottles of lotions and moisturizers in your backpack whenever you want to go travel on your number 9? Just curious. You're manly in your own way, brother from another mother.

Fact #9 -- for real?
dah la homo, metro plak tuh..
haha...tu la, suke ejek org pakai baju/suar belang2 agik~ =P

aku rasa kau ni sebenarnya kegilaan ramai orang

Cloudde: I was half expecting that mellow caller thing to be honest. Wouldn't really call mellow though, even now; I was barely awake man.

Hanim: Jap jap, masa bila aku ejek orang pakai seluar belang? Ohh... cik abang Ben kau. Ahahaha...

Pie: Kurang tepat Pie. Plus, aku bukan Mawi. World!

the last time we played bball, u stayed on the court longer than Judd.

that's huge!

I thought you don't do tags.

Hussen: Bigger than rebuking a photoshopped ghost pic no less.

Sani: Not if they ask me who I was on the phone with.

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Photography by Azalia Suhaimi

  • Asrif, b. 1983
  • Subang Jaya, Malaysia
  • asrifomar[@]gmail[.]com
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